Tennis Shoe Afterthoughts

So I've had a little time to think since writing this post yesterday and I've discussed it with a several people since then as well, most coming from my new Learning Circle. We talked about acceptance last night. Acceptance with ourselves, with motherhood, of others. It was great, and I feel like I bore my whole soul on a first date. Not sure how I feel about that in retrospect, but let's just "accept" that that's who I am. I'm a talker.

So here are my afterthoughts. I worry way to much about these kinds of things and what other people think. I think I'm highly aware of my flaws and imperfections right now in my life and I project those flaws onto other people. I assume everyone else in the world thinks the same thing about me as I do. I think everyone else is comparing me to all these cute single women on dates in line at Zupa's on Friday night. I think everyone looks at my not very tight abs and compares me to the other first time mom, whose belly just magically goes back after having that baby. It's silly really. I always get this way, at about this time, after having a baby. Last time it prompted me to do the Mrs. Utah pageant, to help myself gain some confidence, to squeeze out some me time, and to get myself back in order, and you know what...it worked. I just need to get my confidence back.

I'm not sure what I'll do next, but at least I can see this phase for what it is. Postpartum, baby slave, desperately needing some me time, mommy craziness. So don't worry folks, I'll snap out of it, and I've got some good goals to help get me there.